Camping, Dog, Jumbone, Damaged Car

So I gave Nanook a Jumbone on the last evening, figuring if I was having a treat then he should too. And man did he appreciate it!! He snatched, which he never does unless it's GOOD stuff, went to lie down opposite the tent, just enough away so as to be in eye sight but no where near enough close that I could reach out and take the precious Jumbone, and I'm telling you that dog went to town. He was making grunting noises that reminded me of perhaps a whale feasting on giant seal after months and months of frozen sea trekking. He chewed and he grunted and he swallowed and he growled with pleasure. And then I got my treat out. 

Id just made a lovely warm cup of hot chocolate and I considered my treat options. Chocolate biscuits or Dairy Milk Oreo bar?? To be honest the decision didn't take all too long and in my head that question actually went "chocolate biscuits or Da-" and then the decision was made. So I gently, like in the adverts almost seductively, like this chocolate bar was going to be in for a bloody good night of gentle spanking and silky bondage, caressed the outside of the smooth bar. I felt the perfectly square nobbles of chocolate underneath, aching for their release. I carefully followed the easy unpacking instructions and pulled the paper seems apart. I felt like I was unpopping the shirt buttons of Sean Bean such was my excitement. 

And there it was. Slutty, tantalising, beautiful Orea stuffed chocolate. I broke a length off. And that's when the romance ended. And I ended up with a dent on my car. 

Nanook, with his selectively astounding hearing, had heard the rather erotic unveiling of what should have been MY guilty pleasure. His Jumbone which had served him so well was now officially defunct. It all happened in slow mo. As I opened the top layer and snapped off the length that would have been at least a meals worth of calories, I had a huge open mouthed "yay" expression on my face. At the same time, Nanook with ALL of his force, who also happened to be mid lick of his Jumbone, LAUNCHED the Jumbone towards the car. As my "yay" face looked up to great a flying, top lip flapping, ears pinned back with G-force, pupils so dilated they were totally black, wolf, the Jumbone, in equal amounts of slow motion, went hurtling through the air.

It made a "whooomppp-whooomppp" noise as it tumbled through oxygen particles, parting like the Red Sea in a direct line to my car door. And as my face began to droop to a "nooooooo" face, and Nanook has successfully made his way over to the tent, skidding on all fours to come to an abrupt mouth open half, he pawed me straight in the eye to beg for the chocolate, and the Jumbone made a rather loud "clunk" noise as it rocketed off the paint work. 

In summary, Nanook got his chocolate, my car is now damaged, and I have learnt Jumbones are not only a tasty dog treat, but also a weapon.