Packing Failure

Oh I am tired. Must go to sleep after this.

So yeah packing fail.. I bought a 60 litre rucksack with a 15 litre detachable day sack and I can't fit a fucking thing in. I've attached my sleeping bag to the bottom of the rucksack, my mosquito net fits in just, but as soon as my walking shoes are in and my wash kit - there is NO room for anything else.

So I buy some vacuum sacks and do they work?? NO! I just don't understand how 60 litres of backpack is not enough. Craig ages ago said he could get me a massive one that was like 100 litres for free but I said no because silly me thought 60 litres would be enough.

Here is my packing list:

• 2 pairs linen trousers
• 2 pairs shorts
• 10 pairs knickers
• 7 pairs of ankle socks
• 3 bras
• 4 boob tubes
• one very light cotton shirts
• 2 pairs PJ shorts
• 2 PJ tops
• 2 jumpers
• 1 hoody
• 1 pair trackies
• 2 skirts
• 2 bikinis
• 2 flight carigans
• 3 vest tops
• laptop
• walking shoes
• walking sandles
• wash kit
• phone charge
• travel adapter
• camera
• hat
• ipod
• sleeping bag
• sleeping pillow
• torch
• money wallet
• diary
• address book
• copies of ID and actual ID
• book
• mosquito net

I need a friggin trunk and a man servant to help me carry all this shit. And according to the realgap packing list, I have missed about a thousand items!!! Sigh.

Teddy Bear Death

I am an evil person. I have suffocated my teddy bears to death.

During the packing process I stumbled across my biggest dilemma.. what do I do with all my teddy bears I have brought with me?! Each has a meaning and each was given to me by a special person for a special occasion. For example I have Greg! He is 26 this year and my first bear. He has a bow tie and his brown skinfur-fluff has been dyed by the sun. And then there is Billy! Bought by the ex for my 21st and the hippest with his Sketchers and sunglasses. And Cappy - a bear bought by everyone on my team at Capstone.

Their fate was dependant on my neurosis. When I was a kid I would sleep on the very edge of my bed so that each of my teddies could have their feet under the covers.. I didn't want them to get cold. They were also all married to a fellow teddy bear and the smaller ones were the biggers ones babies. My teddy bears were and still are very important. I felt guilty putting them in a bagin the wardrobe.

So.. the dilemma. Could I really vacuum pack them when it clearly means I will deprive them of oxygen?? Could I live with the horror of knowing I had crushed their stuffed with fluff skulls?!?! The only other option though was having them loose in a ciggy smoke filled house... that would not do.

I packed them slowly and lovingly into the giant vacuum bag. Emily my housemate watched from the doorway.. grinning rather too menicingly for my liking.. I zipped the bag, patted it a few times and let out a sigh. I picked up the nozzle and switched the hoover on. It was quick. It was mortifying. It was done.

Cappy was the flattest I had ever seen him. Billy's boots were poking out against the tight plastic sack of no air. Greg looked lost :(

I have put them in a stasis like deathly silence. I'm sorry bears. Mumma loves you :-(

Fat bugger

Hey you. How was your week?

Mine was bog standard and as per the usual.. had an argument with a team leader, despaired at the lack of sense people appear to have, started another new diet in an attempt to become a size 8 in 4 weeks, had the "what will I do when I come back debate", and had a Chutneys. Again, the Chutney man knew who I was and genuinely sounded upset when I told him I am leaving in 4 weeks time. Which is only fair really.. he will lose significant trade.

I'm desperate to be rich in a pleasant way. I don't want to be stinking rich because people would expect things of me so I guess what I mean is I want to live very comfortably. I have found a house in Staveley that is quite frankly beyond beautiful. And as much as I can't stand the Derbyshire accent (sorry to those I love with the accent..) I adore the lifestyle that Derbyshire can offer. Great countryside, you still have the neighbourly connections I haven't seen down here, and the connections to the big cities are only 30 minutes away in each direction from Chesterfield!

I've been thinking what I would do with that big house. It has a massive garden so I thought I could make money from it!! Offer garden parties to people! People can give me a budget, a theme and a date/time and I will do the rest. It satisfys my obsessive need to plan and make things a theme, and it gives me something to do with an income! I can't think of anything better.

I've also thought about foster care. I've always thought about it and if I had that house I would feel more comfortable about it too. Good links to my mum, room for the kids, things to do with them in the area.

I appear to have issues with being content with what lies in store. Yes I can't wait to go travel but I can't concentrate on that anymore because I know it's happening!! It appears now it is a minor annoyance lol.. a blip in getting back home to my mum and a house I want to buy. I can't even afford the house but I'm desperate to get back and buy it!! It of course won't even be there when I get back but that doesn't stop me mentally decorating it already.

I've been packing today for the second time in six months. Thank the lord for vacuum sack thingies!!!! I condensed my winter 13.5 tog double duck feather duvet called Stan down from fucking massive to smaller than my guitar!! Epically impressed. I have used all the boxes I stole from work for vases, picture frames and DVDs so I reckon I need another 8 for the wardrobe and kitchen maximum.

This week went quite quickly actually... I'm looking forward to pay day! My last full pay from Capstone and my word do I have some plans for it lol. I have a holiday to Tunisia to put aside for, my actual travels - must order some travel money, my last lot of rent and so far 3 work outings. MANY PENNIES!!! And of course, must apply for my loan. Seriously if I don't get it I really think I am screwed. We will see.

Wow long blog. Sorry!! I will update with something funny like the old times soon I promise lol. Have a good weekend yo. x